Monday, August 22, 2011

To DNR or not to DNR

I hope no one takes offense to this posting, and some of it may be a "poor me" attitude but, I am venting right now. My Mom passed away back in Feb of this year. She had been battling health issues for years. Her body was filled with different infections that it couldn't fend off. The doctors told us her chances of recovery were pretty slim. Sis was against a DNR (Do Not Resucitate). Dad and I felt it was at the point where Mom needed to rest. We went with the DNR and Mom passed within weeks.

Here we are, six months after Mom's passing and Dad is in the hospital, fighting for his life. His body filled with the same infections Mom had, plus two more. Since I am Dad's next of kin, the hospital called me in Arkansas and said I needed to come home. Upon arriving to the hospital, I saw, for the first time, the condition my Dad was in. :( The hospital said all medical decisions were in my hands now. How can you expect family to make that decision when they first walk through the door? I just lost my Mom back in February. Not trying to lose my Dad too. Dad also said he wanted all measures taken to bring him back. He was scared. You could see it in his eyes. I told the doctor to use all measures to bring him back if he codes. That's my Dad. The only parent I have left. I'm selfish and want to keep him around for a while.

The next day we spent all day with Dad. He slept a lot. But, he knew we were there. Went home that night and visited with family. The next morning, I was heading to the cemetery to visit Mom. I got a call to go to the hospital. When I walked in, Dad's medical team was at hi room. One doctor pulled me to the side and explained that Dad had gotten worse. He had an episode during the night where his lungs quit working an his heart acted up. They had him on forced oxygen and the "crash cart" posted in his room. Once again, I was faced with the DNR question. It was time. :(

They kept trying to keep Dad fighting. Medicine and air. Unfortunately, It wasn't enough and Dad lost his battle just after 4:00 pm that same day. I truly believe Dad missed Mom and wanted to be with her. He's with her now. They're fishing together in Heaven. I'm sure they are arguing like old times but, that's how they showed their love for each other. I miss you Dad. I'm glad you're with Mom again but, I wish you were both still here.

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